Posted by: canthold | February 27, 2008

Too Too Tutu

My First Grader (geez-o-pete, is that capitalized or not?) ANYWAY, my first grader started a unit on poetry today. I was able to sit in on it during my weekly Writer’s Workshop volunteer session. The teacher talked about creating images with words and I thought I’d give you an example right here.

A pink hippopotamus in a short little tutu stretches her arms up in the air to form an “O,” while her body rises on her toes, delicately clad in ballet shoes.

But she’s actually not wearing pink, but navy blue. And there is no tutu. And instead of ballet shoes, she’s just wearing white ankle socks.

That’s me! I took a ballet class today. I felt so giddy like a little kid all over again. Fun-a-rama. Except that I felt like a hippo with my round middle to contrast the dainty and perfect body of the instructor. I kept thinking that I should look like that. We’re the same height. I used to look like that. She’s going to be my inspiration to stop reaching into the freezer and eating the Heathbar Ice Cream straight out of the carton with my spoon. I will not finish the half-gallon all by myself.

I simply will not.

Taking ballet again has given me a lot to think about. I felt so light today, all hippo-ness aside. I was in a particularly good mood, which was a treat after feeling so crappy for (what feels like) so long now.

I had the nagging feeling that I needed to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. I’m very aware that staying home with my children affords me the luxury of reinventing myself at this next stage of my life. I had a major to push at the beginning of the year to re-think my career relaunch and while I’ve stalled out a bit, I know the decision and transition are not too far off on the horizon.

I want to mention another book that I just started reading about ambition, but I don’t have it in front of me to give you the title or the link. More to follow. But suffice it to say, right now, I just had a power surge in my ignition.

Now I think I’ll reduce my carbon emissions and walk to the school to pick up my kids. That and it’ll take about that long to stop thinking about what I looked like in that full-sized mirror today.



  1. It sounds utterly simplistic – but I KNOW this is true. If you abstain from refering to yourself as a hippo and treating yourself unkindly when looking in the mirror, but CHOOSE instead to say, “I really am this beautiful” then you will begin to feel better and to literally LOOK better.

    Also, if you put Skinny Cow or Thin Bear ice cream in your fridge you can still eat ice cream – but you don’t have to have the guilt (it’s only 100 – 140 calories, which is less than salad dressing.)

    I’m happy to hear about your ballet class. It’s a pleai (sp?) in the right direction.

  2. I looked at myself in the mirror for an entire hour and I realized that there is a disconnect between what I want to look like and what I want to eat. I think that I will wear something more flattering next time that makes me feel better about that reflection.

    And darned if I didn’t finish off that half-gallon all by myself. Boy was it yummy. I’ll check out your suggestion, though, next time I’m at the store.

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