Posted by: canthold | June 16, 2008

Spiders, Otters and a Fuzzy Tiger

I opened up a bunch of boxes this weekend thinking I’d pare down my books. We must have a good 15 boxes stored in an inconvenient spot, waiting for liberation. Of course, as soon as I looked inside, it was like Christmas all over again. I wanted to keep them all. That’s not entirely true. I’m going to send the book on brewing beer off to the library book sale. I’ll never use it and I don’t even drink beer anymore. (That much.) Also, I had a few more baby books and I’m not having anymore of those.

I’d love to devise some ingenious plan to get them all on shelves in a tasteful yet discrete (read: hidden) so that I can display them but my husband won’t have to look at them. I have two drawers under my bed that I use – and about three mile high stacks next to my bed, too. And shelves in my crawl space and office – which is in the crawl space – thus the explanation for the profound number of spiders.

What was that line in Almost Famous? “…And if you ever get lonely, just go to the record store and visit your friends.” My books are my friends. I want them around me.

I dug out my old yearbook from my senior year in high school. I was voted “Most Changed Over Four Years.” That’s a funny set of pictures these days. And I dug out my Army Basic Training Yearbook to show my kids Mommy As A Soldier. Even funnier. But funniest of all, were the two Calvin and Hobbes books that I dug out, as well. I read the comics to my kids and they barely got them. Partly because the cultural references are a bit dated, but the humor is not exactly for children. One in particular gave me a ten minute belly laugh. My stomach ached when I was done. My kids were laughing at me laughing but they needed me to explain why it was so funny. Hobbes had a dream he was in a vicious fight with a weasel and wondered what it meant. The last frame shows Calvin all beaten up and not quite amused. It loses something in the translation’m sure, but so funny at the time.

I’ve been eating Otter Pops like they’re going out of style and wearing a turtle neck sweater because I’m so cold from eating so many. I just love them!

And today, I must have killed 600 spiders. I found one in my office and brought in the vacuum. Then I looked up and saw what appeared to be little bits of fuzz in one of the areas I always check. Turns out those bits of fuzz were hundreds of babies. I’m a baby killer. Yep. Not something I’m proud of, but you know those things grow up to be quite large, don’t you? I vacuumed up about 10 of the large ones and several mediums. And then there was a giant (GIANT!) black fuzzy one the size of a quarter (or larger!) and not a cellar spider either, this one had a giant body and scary, pointy black legs! I killed it in my laundry basket by pounding it over the head (etc.) with an empty tissue box. I couldn’t get the vacuum in time to ensure that I’d not lose it before I came back (like the giant cellar spider in my bedroom, today.)

And what else? I did Tai Chi with my daughters today. Actually my oldest was a good sport, but my youngest just pouted and had to be sent out of the room. I haven’t had any vertigo for two days and my new Cooking Without A Grain of Salt book came today so that I can start working on that angle of vertigo control. And I can make a shopping list – we’re out of everything, (except Otter Pops.)

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