Posted by: canthold | September 30, 2008

My Pity Party

I’ve been in denial about my vertigo. I decided a while back that I needed to just get on with my life and learn to live with it. I couldn’t stand the idea that I was actually disabled – especially when I compared my little problem to the grand scheme of things.

Well, wishful thinking and a positive attitude only gets you so far in the real world. I mean, my fairy wings aren’t lifting me off the ground these days.

Vertigo sucks.

I still have it almost every day. I think that I kind of had a handle on it before we went on vacation. The time change, red-eye flight, extremely long layover in an airport without proper supplies, HOT humidity at our destination, being out of my element and a long travel time getting home somehow threw my body out of whack. Ever since I’ve been home, I’ve been dealing with the vertigo almost daily. In a good week, I will only have it three to five times.

Yesterday wasn’t great and today was one of the worst days that I can remember. There are a  lot of those, but this one ranks right up there. I worked today – my entire shift – with mild vertigo. That was after taking the maximum amount of medicine that I could take and still function. I should have called in sick, but you know what? I can’t let my life spin out of control.

My wish has been – since about February – that this left ear vertigo fries out my hearing and goes away. It is my understanding that there is a connection between the vertigo and hearing. As one diminishes the other goes away too.

But Sunday night when my neighbor had his music so loud at 3:00am that I could actually hear the lyrics, I realized that my hearing is not bad enough yet. Then again, my husband complains when I snooze the alarm for about an hour, but often, I don’t even hear it go off.

Complain. Complain. I think I’ll take a short nap before picking up daughter #1 or in between picking up #1 and #2. And I’ll research solutions to my very awful (poor me) problem. Then I’ll try to remember what it was that made me feel so good last time and try to duplicate it. I’m thinking acupuncture…

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Responses

  1. I’m so sorry you’re still dealing with this. I hope the acupuncture works.


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